Extreme Ownership Lesson #1
A true leader owns every mistake
Do you know about Extreme Ownership?
Jocko Willink and Leif Babin present a different take on leadership books. They put the team first.
While reading it, it caught my attention how well they illustrate their leading principles since they live by them. They experienced them.
Lead and win.
And for that, I want you to think about their No. 1 lesson today.
Extreme ownership lesson #1
We often talk about leaders and what they should or should not do. You hear about personalities, skills, traits, etc.
What you perhaps do not hear is that leaders should take full responsibility for everything in their domain (in their world!).
EVERYTHING
It’s really simple but kind of mind-blowing, too.
Taking full responsibility means you stop blaming your team members, suppliers, bosses, competitors, etc. for mistakes and challenges.
If you are in charge, you own failures, successes, and pretty much all actions of your team members.
Blaming and whining don’t solve problems; only focusing on finding solutions, discussing lessons learned, and taking action matters.
Effective leaders get things done. Period. No excuses.
And yes, even effective leaders have to take accountability and step down if things go horribly wrong.
Reflect: Do you own it?How extreme ownership works
Extreme ownership does not mean doing everything yourself or micromanaging.
It’s about enabling your team and collaborating to achieve the mission. Three things on the way:
Own mistakes: You don’t blame others; you identify what went wrong and how to fix it. Mistakes should not be repeated.
Own solutions: If a team member fails, it’s your responsibility to train, guide, or communicate better.
Own outcomes: Good or bad. The results directly reflect your leadership.
We often get frustrated when people don’t deliver and wonder what they should improve. You use feedback for that.
Yet, leaders must own when something goes wrong, too. “Whose fault is it?” Leaders should say: “Me. Here’s what I could have done better.”
Why should you take responsibility for your teammate missing a deadline?
If this person underperformed, don’t just blame them. Ask yourself: “We missed the deadline—I didn’t set clear priorities. Let’s adjust our approach.”
If someone underperforms, don’t just blame them—ask, “Did I communicate this well enough?”
If you blame others, your team will do so, too. If you show a lesson-learned attitude, they will follow your approach and have a desire to do it better next time.
Reflect: Do you ask yourself enough what you should improve?Shield, relief, and trust
Trust is a big topic in leadership. We say things like lead by example, build relationships, communicate transparently, etc.
What extreme ownership does is show people are not alone in their quest. If you make a mistake and your leader has your back, how does it feel?
You will probably feel relieved in a way. You may want to make your leader look bad next time and try diligently to mitigate mistakes.
You trust people who are in the same boat as you. Not behind, not above, but in the same place.
So, the tricky part for leaders is to take ownership and stop blaming others.
“It failed because they didn’t implement.”
“They made a mistake.”
“They didn’t listen.”
It takes courage to say, “It is my mistake.” Especially for people you don’t like working with. “He’s not a good project manager.” “She is a terrible manager.”
But do you support your team enough? Do you mentor them, give them resources to succeed, and help them understand where they could improve?
We expect people to perform. So do you. You, as a leader, lead your team. That is your responsibility. No excuses.
If someone does not perform even with your support and effort, maybe it’s time to let them go. These are tough decisions to make, but again, you own such things.
Reflect: Do you have your team’s back?Owning every mistake
What happens quite often is that leaders are experts first and then are promoted to leaders.
As an expert, you are the best in your field or area. You perhaps make no mistakes. Then, you become a leader and must deal with other people’s mistakes.
It may feel weird. They make a mistake, and it’s actually your mistake?!
Realizing you are responsible for them can cause some mental block. That is probably why so many leaders are defensive and like making excuses for failures.
Who do you blame?
It takes some self-awareness, courage, and humility (read: leave your ego out) to apply and live extreme ownership.
Keep these people on your team:
Who do you know who always works on improving themselves and acknowledging mistakes as learning and stepping forward?
Who tries to avoid mistakes in the future and analyzes well what went wrong?
Who can you rely on not to scold you for failure but to support you in improving?
Who owns it?
Final Thought
Extreme ownership is a simple concept that can be super hard to apply. Who likes talking about one’s mistakes? It’s so much easier to put the weight on others.
Yet, if you have others’ backs, analyze well what went wrong and take steps to improve, I guarantee you, your team will mimic this approach and work much better together.
It is not you vs. them. You are one team.
Have a good one, Ivona
On the menu:
Monday Case Study: This Is Not How You Delegate
Thursday Newsletter: Why Delegation Isn’t a Task