Staying Cool When You Exit Makes All the Difference
Leave like a pro.
“Let’s burn bridges!”
When you quit, you may finally feel free. No more burden. No more pretending you like your job, boss, or people.
Some people feel that quitting gives them superpowers. Now, they can criticize, expose bad behaviors, and generally act like an ass.
“Now…”
“Now attitude” is counterproductive. Why would you want to burn bridges? You don’t want to do revenge. You want to change a job.
Keep it calm and respectful. Avoid these four ideas people sometimes have. They are silly.
Now, I’ll expose my bad boss.
“Now, I will show everyone what a bad boss he/she is.”
Finally, you can breathe and take revenge. Finally, you don’t have to be silent. You want to let EVERYONE know how terrible your boss is.
"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."
— Confucius
Confucius hit the nail here.
The nature of revenge is destructive. It often harms the avenger as much as the target.
Leaving a job because you are dissatisfied, your boss is toxic, the processes haven’t changed for years, etc. gives you a high level of annoyance.
While it might feel that quitting allows you to be honest, being out of the blue harsh and critical does not bring anything good for you.
“I will show them.”
This attitude rather shows you are pathetic and unprofessional. Common!
What held you back during your tenure from trying to communicate what you would change and work on better? I am not saying everything is your fault. On the other hand, personalities sometimes don’t click.
But honestly, to whom do you want to show? Revenge makes you look like a fool.
Plus, how about references for your future employers? Do you think people like hiring someone bitter and disloyal?
You always have a chance to speak to people directly. No need to poison your relationships when you’ve filed your resignation letter.
Now, we settle the debts.
When you quit, you’re likely to trash-talk the job and the processes.
“We work like monkeys.”
“Clients are idiots.”
“This software remembers Windows 98.”
You know what I mean. Whatever you did not like about the job, you smash during coffee breaks and team meetings.
It does make people think about their jobs. Is it that bad? They might start to wonder. One trash-talker can crack a stable and friendly team culture.
“Everything is bad. I am leaving and you should leave, too.”
This gave me a headache when a team member was leaving and settling his debts. He was so annoying. I wished him to be gone.
Your only debt is to keep working and delivering based on the quality and standards set. Leaving does not mean not working anymore.
Common. You are paid for the business as usual. Your end date does not change that.
Now, I am free to do whatever.
“I am leaving. Nothing can stop me.”
The sad truth is, no one will probably stop you. Just go. Your decision.
However,…
You are not free to do whatever. You should be respectful and mind what you say about your company.
Open Glassdoor and you immediately see how people value their employers. Or rather don’t value them. Social media, review sites, and networking events are full of cries from people who feel they are free to say anything.
What’s out there, will stay there. You can’t take your words back.
So, being mindful is a better strategy. Yes, there is a way to criticize anonymously (after all, every employee survey is like that), but choose your battle and channel well.
Don’t forget you may work for a client company and still work with the team you were based on before. Strange things happen.
(Karma!)
Don’t plan your revenge, plan your future in the business.
Now, I will burn the bridges.
This quote makes me laugh:
Oh, seeing that bridge burn can give you a lot of satisfaction. Remember that scene from Bridget Jones’ Diary when she quits the job? She’s the rockstar.
And yet, you can end up applying for the job in the same company a few years later or working with the same boss.
Leave bridges standing. Even if you didn’t like the boss, colleagues, work, or office.
The more bridges you have, the better access to opportunities you have. Connect as many points as possible. That is what you should be doing instead of fussing around.
You’re welcome!
TL;DR
Revenge isn't sweet. It is rather sour for your career. Leave your bridges intact for the future. Trash-talking your old job might feel good, but professionalism pays the bills. Haha.
Quitting doesn’t grant superpowers - just the chance to start fresh. The future is bright for those who remain loyal.
Happy quitting if you are about to. Ivona
On the menu:
Monday Case Study: How to Start Coaching Your Team
Thursday Newsletter: 2024 Wrap-up